Confession 3

There are some downfalls to being what I am, such as tiredness.  Life's a long journey for the normal man but when your constantly up and down that journey is a lot harder.  I am currently a student and student athlete and I love where i'm at but there is little isolation.   All humans have something that is called a defense mechanism and my confession is that mine is isolation.  I know i'm not alone when I say isolation is what keeps me sane.  The thing is though a lot of people don't understand why we need isolation.  I am bombarded with teammates and fellow students constantly asking why I am a hermit and why I don't like to party or go to bars.  I can easily and do say things such as I can't afford it and usually that is what I say but realistically I love to be in my own mind.  When I go out its easy for me to forget who I am because I try to impress or whatever the circumstance may be and that's not me.  Alcohol has put me into a psych ward which was probably a good thing but I just hope people will understand.  Maybe its a maturity thing that separates us... Now I'm not saying I just sit in my room all day and do nothing because that's not what happens.  I am lively during the day and go to class, jump around on the field, and then do some homework.  Then I might turn off my lights and grab my guitar and just meditate. Meditating is one thing that helps me stabilize my ups and downs.  Lastly I love to just think.  I don't think about women, parties, or anything in those lines but instead I love to think about God, politics, and anything else I find fascinating.  This thinking thing is supposedly a bipolar affect but I love it!  My mind raises with so many thoughts that how can I be bored?  I hope Y'all enjoyed the read, leave a comment or like and have a blessed day.